January 2010
December 2009
dreams of the unknown.
i had a dream you died last night. and all these people were in this strange house mourning your death. i was crying so hard i couldnt breath, it was horrible. people were speaking about you, and gathering around. i walked in shyly afraid of what to say. your parents who werent your parents welcomed me and told me they knew i loved you. and i did. i need to say something to make the fact...
i finally found peace.
i am at peace with you. you are merely memories i will always cherish.. but for now and as far as i can see in the future we are done.. as sad as that is you made your bed now you gotta lay in it. i am ok with everything, i am ok with you and me and being separate and i am ready to find some new boy to hold my hand and tell me i am special. you were a wonderful experience and i will never...
what do you want from me? →
as the snow fell.
the snow i ve been wanting decided to show itself today. it decided that it would erase the one thing that has remained constant my entire life. freezing cold weather with no caroling and to think this is the first year he said he’d go in years… i wonder if he knew it would work out this way.. stuck in warwick in a snow storm miles away from the things i miss. and worse of all the...
i ve been wanting snow for weeks and it has to come the one day i have something to look forward to… i really hope caroling still happens…
tikalumbo:
He never loved you anyway. Stop crying.
Kiss Kiss →
Screw finals, Who wants to come over to cuddle and...
(via downtowngirl)
just as i suspected.. when i woke, the feeling was no longer here… it faded away with my dreams as the sun brought the world to life.
friends
so many days go by when im not me, i dont smile because i cant help it. today with the help of my wonderful friends. all i could do is smile. i love you guys always. and i appreciate everything you ve done. i never want to leave warwick, its my home, and it makes me happy. no one ever cared. but the warwick kids do, and i love that. i love it so much i cant help but smile. and that makes me...
move past it...
i was sad. i was missing you. i was thinking i had lost it all. nope. you did. you will never find someone like me. we were in love. we were meant to be and you fucked it up. your loss! i will be fine. starting right now. i am ok. i dont need you. i am moving past it. getting over my addiction to your lameness. i am ok without you. i will be happy without you there. i will find someone else who...
you make me feel better... haha
Julie: I WANT TO NOT BE SAD!
Jessica: i konw
know*
Julie: make it stop
Jessica: unfortunately i dont have the power....only you hold the true power...if life is a road and you are the driver you are the one in charge of controlling your self and getting back on track when you get off track
Julie: why are you so philosophical?
Julie: why are you so philosophical?
Jessica: idk do you not want me to?
Julie: no its cool
Jessica: ok also you can use your car in life to run over and destroy people/things in life that you dont like
or did you wronf
wrong*
Julie: i cant do that!
i dont need you. i am sad and i dont even know why any more. if you are going to be such a dick then i am done with you. you got to be a part of my life but you fucking blew it. we are over. you chose this. and if you ever want to change that. it will take a lot more then ‘i love you’. i dont need you. i am strong without you. i am happy with out you. so stay the hell away from...
paper heart. →
i know its lame. but its one of those songs from...
everyday i wake up with this unsettling feeling which i am now understanding is the realization of the fact that we are in deed over. maybe not for good, or for ever. but for now. and in order to survive i have to let you go, i have to get over this and move past it. i just wish everything wasnt crashing down at once.
it makes me sad how quickly you erased me.
i liked being yours.
love songs.
you never realize the truth behind stupid love songs and things said about love in movies until your entire world caves in because he leaves… and then youre left all alone thinking about those stupid love songs that surround your thoughts…
fuck life. nothing good ever comes from it. love drains away your soul. friends lie and betray you. and eventually you grow up and your family cant support you any more. you are born alone. and you die even more alone because this time your mother and the doctors arent there to make sure everything is ok.
FUCK LIFE. FUCK THE WORLD. FUCK SOCIETY. live and let live. live to die.
is it possible to miss someone you cant remember?
i miss you.
but the memory of you has slowly vanished…
and now i am all alone with this dull feeling pushing its way through the emptiness that you left behind…
once i had hopes, and inspiration. a desire to be more then a object that turns oxygen to carbon dioxide. once i wanted to live.
the days where things had feeling and meaning are gone. i dont know why they are gone. i dont even know where they went. all i know is that nothing is everywhere.
i feel nothing but emptiness. its not even an emptiness that i can use to fuel my art. it is an emptiness...